Molly The Explorer

I think Molly spends most of her time outside trying to get me stung, bit by something, or mauled. She has to explore every smell, hole in the ground, and tall patches of grass looking for what left that smell. The other day she discovered a hole in the ground on where of our walks so naturally I pulled her away from it with a "Molly! Get out of there!" About three seconds after I pulled her out of there, some bee's came pouring out of the whole. I was afraid it might be a snake hole but bee's are probably worse for me. If Molly got stung on the nose, I doubt she would be happy about it either.

A Restless Soul

Molly has become very restless in her golden years. She could not make up her mind where she wanted to end up last night. She went from room to room trying to figure out where she was going to be most comfortable. She tried the floor in my bedroom, the floor in my reading room closet, back to the floor in my bedroom, and she was on my bed three or four times. Of course, she finally decided on my bed when I turned in to go to sleep but she always made sure she knew where I was. If I got out of my chair in the living room, I could see Molly peeking out from the reading room closet to see exactly where I was. I guess she wanted to make sure I wasn't going anywhere.

Molly Devious

Molly has a devious side to her and she was at her devious best last night. She started woofing and barking at me at about 4:30 this morning and that usually means that she needs out. I tried to tell her that it was a false alarm because she really didn't need out but she insisted that she did. She barked and woofed for about five more minutes until I had enough. I resigned myself to the fact I was going to have to get up and take her out. I got up and start getting dressed and I put my shoes on and I turned around and said, "Alright Molly, let's go." As it turns out, she just wanted me out of the bed so she could have my nice warm spot. When I grabbed the leash she had already hopped up on the bed and was spread out and almost asleep. I ended up not having to take her out until almost 11 AM this morning.

Listening

When I was out with my late afternoon walk with Molly, I decided to try to listen to nature rather than just watch it. I could hear the gentle crunch of the white gravel under my feet as I walked down the driveway, I could hear Molly panting as she plodded along beside me, and I could hear the birds in the trees, and the crickets chirping in the grass. What I did not hear was civilization as we know it today. I didn't hear any cars, I didn't hear any lawnmowers or leaf blowers, and I did not hear the loudest of all of the animals- people. It was a beautiful and serene walk. It is one Molly and I take every day.

National Dog Day

Molly believes that every day should be National Dog Day, and as man's best friend, it should be. Molly has been side by side with me every day for 13 years and it has been one hell of a fun ride. We have laughed, we have cried, and we have shared it all. Molly has enriched my life in more ways than I can count and just when I thought I couldn't go any more, Molly is standing at the door saying "C'mon, Dan. We need to go out, You'll feel better." She was right. The peace and quiet of our nature walks, I always see something I have never seen before, and our walks have a calming effect on me in a stress filled world. I couldn't have made it this long without her.

Self Defense

I took Molly for our usual walk this morning and I got to thinking that if something does come at us, I have nothing to defend ourselves with. I would really rather not take a pistol because I really do not want to take a chance on shooting Molly and I really do not want to kill anything else either. The best I could do was my Rawlings Adirondack Ron Cey Model P302 autographed baseball bat. I just hope the bear doesn't know anything about baseball. I do not think my .22 Smith and Wesson pistol would do much damage and I can see it now. My Clint Eastwood impersonation: "Well, we just can't let you slap all of the ass off of us." The bear: "Who's we, sucka?" Me: "Molly, Smith & Wesson, and me," and I go to blasting. All of my shots miss and I piss the bear off and then me and Molly run like a couple of school girls.

Vacation Is Over

My vacation comes to an official end tonight. No more hour long naps with Molly, no more sleeping late with Molly, and no more lounging around with Molly. I adopted the motto "I work to live not live to work" and as long as I keep Molly in dog treats, she is happy with me having to go to work. I can't say Molly is exactly happy about me going to work, but she is more understanding.

I watched Molly sleep this afternoon. Head on my pillow, body stretched out, and her cheeks would flap whenever she would take a deep breath. She is such a deep sleeper. I make sure I call out her name before I wake her up so I can move her over. She begrudgingly moves to her corner of the bed so I can lay down. She still likes to lean up beside me while she sleeps as long as I am not to restless.

A Day Of Rest

Molly has taken Sunday as a day of rest a little bit too literally as she has barely been out of bed all day long. I was rearranging some furniture and she got up to see what all of he commotion was about but that has been about it. She likes to check and see what I am doing. She likes the house that we live in now and doesn't want to have to move again. She likes the nice, long walks we take and all of the woods and the bushes and even the wildlife. I like it here too and I have no plans of moving either. I should take a page out of Molly's book and go take a nap myself. I have a lot I did not get accomplished over my vacation to do this afternoon. I wonder if it is possible to squeeze nine days worth of work into one afternoon. Nah, I would be better off taking the nap.

Observations

Our brush with the bear last week has definitely made me more observant about our surroundings as we take our walks especially late in the afternoon. I have always been on the look out for snakes and other creepy, crawly wildlife but the bear pretty much snuck up on us. I have learned to pay more attention to Molly's nose and I can tell when she has got her nose firmly wrapped around the scent of something. When Molly stops and sticks that nose straight up in the air, it might as well be a red warning flare that is being lit. She has always been that way but I just always figured it was a rabbit or a squirrel or something non lethal. Not any more. I was amazed at how sneaky such a large animal can be. I need to trust Molly's nose and I should have figured out by now, if it is too quiet, something is going on.

Protect The Wildlife

As the word of my bear story spread I started getting a lot of feedback on my blog and on Facebook. I also heard back from an element I did not expect to hear from and that is the hunters. I said "bear" and their eyes lit up. First of all, I have nothing against hunters because my father was one. I went hunting with him on several occasions but I chose not to carry a gun. I enjoyed watching my father work with his dogs and the mutual respect they had for each other. My father was in tune with nature and he respected wildlife. I could not bring myself to kill anything but there was no better way to spend a Saturday than out in the woods during the fall with my father and his dogs.

The hunters that heard my story all said that it was almost bear season and the bear "would be taken care of." I do not want him to be taken care of. The is fine just the way he is. I will give him all the space he needs and he and his bear family are free to roam. I just hope I have a better photo op next time. The bear has sanctuary on my property any time he needs it.

Evidently my efforts to give the bear sanctuary have gone for naught. My landlord believes that the bear is a little too close to people for comfort and he is going to allow a friend of his to bring some "bear dogs" over and chase him off. I can understand his reasoning but I am still not happy about it.

The Snoopy Dance

Cartoonist Charles Schultz gave his dog Snoopy a "happy dance" when he created his comic strip Peanuts, a dance that Snoopy did when he was overjoyed with life. They even mentioned the Snoopy dance on the television show Psych. Every dog has a happy dance that demonstrates their exuberance for life. Molly's always involved running and jumping and running in circles around your feet. Now it just involves a little bit of woofing and if she feels really good, she might turn a circle or two. Still not bad for a dog of 13 and I know what she means.

I read an article the other day that said that most animals are capable of feeling and showing emotions. That is a fact dog owners have known for years. Some dogs even smile when they are happy and if you look closely enough, you can see the joy in their eyes. No one in this world is happier to see you come home than your dog. Once you walk in the door, you get to see a real happy dance. At least one "person" is happy to see me when I come home.

Wore Out

Molly and I are both wore out from our mad dash from the bear the other night and neither one of us barely made it out of bed this morning. When we did make it out of bed, we didn't stay out for long. It was a great day for napping. We told our story to everyone that would listen and there was a slight risk when telling the story of us looking like weenies but when it comes to getting all of the ass slapped off of us, being a weenie is a stigma I can live with. Call Molly names at your own risk. Survival is the key and we survived our encounter with a Black Bear. Granted, he is one of the more docile bears in the bear kingdom, but when he stood up on his hind legs, he wasn't asking for directions or wanting to know the name of a good restaurant.

I have been to the spot where we encountered the bear several times and he might actually be bigger than I thought. The angle I was looking at him was actually downward so he may have been a little taller. He was still a very impressive and very beautiful animal. I was lucky enough to see him.

A Bear Story

I decided to walk Molly right before dark last night. I usually walk her a lot earlier than that because the woods around my house are full of all sorts of creatures. The only thing we usually run into is the friendly groundhog who believes in running and hiding. I always walk Molly to the end of the driveway and back which is about 150 yards. It is a nice walk, it gives Molly the chance to commune with nature, and me a chance to take a deep breath. We made it to the end of the driveway and was on our way back down when I saw movement in the bushes to my left.

I thought it was one of the stray dogs that has been getting into my garbage. It was jet black and was really big. I yelled "Get out of here!" About the time I got that out of my mouth I realized how big this "dog" really was. When I yelled, he stopped, turned around, we looked at each other, and I thought, "Damn! That is an ugly dog!" He stood up on his hind legs. He was about six feet tall when he stood straight up. My brain finally made the connection that I was staring eye-to-eye with a bear. I was so surprised to see a bear looking me in the eye all I could do was yell, "Shit! That's a bear!" He was still standing up on his hind legs looking at me and gave his best Robert DeNiro impression in Taxi Driver and seemed to be saying, "You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me?" He showed no fear of me and Molly whatsoever but looked at us more out of a sense of curiosity.

The so called wildlife experts all will tell you not to run from a bear but I believe strongly in self preservation so I ran. Molly was right by my side every step of the way and we ran like our hair was on fire. I haven't ran one hundred yards that fast since I was in high school. Fear is a great motivator. I looked behind me one time and baseball legend Satchel Paige once said "Don't look behind you. Something might be gaining on you." I looked behind me because I wanted to know if I needed to run faster.

I got back in the house and immediately researched Black Bears just to see what we were dealing with. Luckily for me and Molly, they are not an aggressive breed of bear. There have been only 61 Black Bear attacks that have resulted in death since 1900. I wasn't so much worried about death as I was an ass whoopin'. I really did not want to be number 62 or to find out of this article was right about the Black Bear not being aggressive. Molly was so rattled. she immediately came in and went to sleep while I turned to the social media to tell my story.

When I think about it, the bear was such a beautiful animal. It had jet black fur that had a shiny sheen to it and it was big and tall. I love seeing nature and wildlife and this is his habitat as much as it is mine. I had no intention of hurting him and I think he realized that, especially when I took off on a dead run. When I yelled at him, he turned around out of a sense of curiosity more so than one of aggression. I would have loved to have gotten some pictures of him but I didn't believe he was going to wait around because I sure didn't.

Molly's New Friend

When it comes to getting into Molly's inner circle, you really have to take it slow. My former roommate worked his way into her inner circle, but he was an alcoholic and I think she felt sorry for him. My girlfriend and I have been dating about ten months now and she has slowly worked her way into Molly's inner circle. Trust is not something Molly does easily and if you ever get on her bad side, you are there permanently. She thought my last girlfriend was her personal chew toy and I even got bit a couple of times in the process. When my girlfriend comes over, she always makes sure she goes in and greets Molly and Molly immediately jumps up and starts wagging her tail and lays those ears of hers flat on her head and starts rubbing up against her. My girlfriend treats Molly with a great amount of respect and Molly has begun to trust her and she is aware that my girlfriend does not pose me a threat. That doesn't mean that Molly is going to leave us in the same room together but I don't think that was ever going to happen anyway.

Max and the Great Chicken Chase

I got an old "hand me down" bird dog of my Dad's one time, a German Short Hair Pointer named Max. Pop's had taken him in from a friend of his and Pop's was not hunting him much and he made plans to give him away. I had gotten attached to him and I wanted to keep him in the family, so Pops turned Max over to me.

Max was a beautiful dog and had tons of personality too. He craved attention and would do whatever it took to get it. He loved to play "fetch" and he just loved people. He had a tail like a baseball bat and when it started wagging, damage could be caused. He was too big to be kept in the house so we had to keep him outside. He was the Harry Houdini of the canine world. I don't care how much Pops and I tried to fence him in, he would figure out a way to escape and he would make a beeline for the house so he could be where the action was.

Our neighbor had some chickens that were always in our yard. One of them got to close to Max one day and he quickly figured out how to escape and the chase was on. Max was a pretty big dog but he had speed and the desire for a chicken dinner on his side. The chicken had quickness and the fear of becoming a chicken dinner on his side. Pops heard the commotion outside and he came out and took off after Max to try to stop him and I took off after Pops to try to stop him.

It looked like a Tom and Jerry cartoon in our backyard that afternoon. Max would dive at the chicken, the feathers would fly, but the chicken continued to get away. Pops was yelling at him the whole time "Max! You better come here!" Max kept on going and as the old saying goes "in for a penny, in for a pound." I was laughing so hard I wasn't much help. This chase went on for about ten minutes until Max had to stop because of exhaustion. He stopped and rolled over on his back and Max looked up at Pops with his tongue hanging out and I will swear he had a smile on his face. Max had a look on his face that said, "I know I am going to get an ass whoopin' for this but, damn, that was fun!" As pissed as Pops was, he couldn't help but laugh either.

My Nap Buddy

"Every dog must have his day." Jonathan Swift

I laid down this morning and took a five and a half hour nap. Molly was beside me every second I was asleep. Molly makes a great nap buddy if I can ever her to share some of the bed. She snores in her sleep, she has dreams, and she acts like a human in almost every way but to call her human would be an insult to Molly. She is way to faithful to be compared to a human.

Talking To Molly

Author Christopher Morley said, "No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does." The best days of my Father's life were spent alone with his dogs. Whether he was out in the woods with his bird dogs, laying out in the backyard in his hammock under the trees, or riding down the road with his dogs perched in his lap or looking out the window, those were the best times of my Father's life.

When I was growing up and even as I grew older, I never really understood the relationship my father had with his dogs. My father passed away over eight years ago and only one of his dogs remain. One of his dogs, a Rat Terrier named Pee Wee, outlasted my father by about five years and lived to be 18 years old. I think the poor dog waited around as long as he could to see if my Father would come back. That dog had a will to live unlike any other living creature I have ever seen.

As I am about to turn 50 later this year, I am finally beginning to understand the relationship my Father had with his dogs. I spend a lot of time alone with Molly because of my work schedule and I could not ask for a better companion, my girlfriend not withstanding. Mr. Morley is right in the fact that Molly knows everything about me, all of my ideas, fears, and concerns, and she still follows me wherever I go, and I follow her. It is a true symbiotic relationship and as Molly's life winds down, I appreciate the time I spend with her more and more every day. I feel totally blessed when Molly and I wake every day and are able to go on one of our walks and I can bounce my ideas off of her.

Get, Get, Get On Up!

When Molly wants me out of bed, she has various ways of making sure I get up. It is much harder on me and her since I started working third shift but Molly has probably adjusted better than I have. This afternoon Molly used the classic "bed bump" where she bumps the bed as hard as she can. If she needs to go out real bad, it feels like an earthquake. Her waking me up is better than the alternative of the smell of dog poo waking me up which has happened before because she could not wake me up.

A Slow Walk

I write often about mine and Molly's walks and that is our time to commune with nature and to gain a perspective on our world. There are days we take slow walks and then there are days like today when we were "old man" slow. Comedian Tim Conway used to do a skit where he was an old man and he just shuffled along at a snail's pace and that was me and Molly this afternoon. I didn't sleep well, my feet and legs are killing me, and Molly is never in a hurry any more. Molly stopped five or six times in the driveway for either rest or because she wanted to be petted but I didn't mind. That is a good thing because I do not think I could keep up with her.

Rain Man

Molly generally doesn't like rain but yesterday afternoon, for whatever reason (Molly generally doesn't give one when she is in a mood), insisted on taking a long walk in the rain. This was right after I had showered for work, got dressed, and was getting ready to go. After our long walk, I had to change clothes, dry myself off as well as Molly but that is her favorite part of walking in the rain, and smell wet dog the rest of the night. Molly may be doing this to get back at me for working third shift and making her be by herself at night.

Rushing Life Along

There are times that I have to remind myself that my walks with Molly are for Molly and not for me. I am always rushing her along because I am in a hurry to go nowhere and our walks gives Molly an opportunity to enjoy what she likes to do and that is stop and smell the roses- and eat grass, and pee on every bush and "hot spot" in the yard, and just generally explore the natural world around her. Molly should be able to do that and I should slow down and explore life with her and maybe pee on a bush or two. I am sure the neighbors would love that.

A Wake Up Rrrraaaa

I was dead asleep this morning and I was awakened to the sight of Molly standing over the top of me, trying to get my attention. Her face was in mine and she was making that special sound only she can make. It sounds like "Rrraa! Rrrraa!" Then if that doesn't get me up, that is when the barking begins. When I first open my eyes, the last thing I expect to see is Molly standing over the top of me with that "Get your ass out bed!" look on her face. We made it out in plenty of time so we could take our morning walk and commune with nature.

A Bed With Fresh Linens

I finally got around to putting fresh linens on my bed and I have to give Molly credit, she waited patiently until I got done. As soon as I was finished tucking that last corner, she hopped up on the bed, made her little nest out of the sheets and the pillows, and was asleep in about two minutes. I soon joined her because working third shift is wearing me out. Of course, I had to move her out of the way so I could even get on the bed but that is a common occurrence. Sometimes she moves, sometimes she doesn't. Molly has a daytime nap buddy even on my days off.

And Then The Rains Came

The first thing I do when I get home in the mornings is walk Molly and the first thing I do when I get up in the afternoons is walk Molly. It is a pretty good routine that we have established but every once in a while that routine goes astray. It has been hot lately, I live on ten acres of land so if it is really hot like it was yesterday, I walk around in just a pair of shorts because there is going to be no one that sees me.

We were out yesterday afternoon and we walked to the far end of the driveway which is about 100 yards from the house when I felt a drop of water hit my back. It had rained earlier in the morning so I thought maybe some water had fell from one of the tree's. Wrong. It started raining, slowly at first, and then it started coming down. Molly and I had to hoof it back to the house but we still got pretty wet. I could see the rain coming down against the backdrop of the green of the trees. It was a pretty sight to see but not so much to be out in.

I Was Framed

A good friend of mine reminded me of a song yesterday when I got back home from my court appearance by Cheech and Chong, "Framed." The theme of the song was "I was framed. I never do nothing wrong but everytime I get the blame." I can see Molly and I doing a skit to that song. I can probably sing as well as Cheech Marin and Molly has been high before (not on my behalf) and I think we could pull it off. Maybe we could do something like Cheech and Chong: Pet Detective. Molly would have been a great drug sniffing dog.

The Court Date

I have to go to court this afternoon because of a little accident Molly and I were involved in a little over a month ago. Although the officer did not ask Molly at the time of the accident, I wonder if I could use her as a witness. I am sure dogs have been in a court before but when Molly starts laying the law down, I am sure that she would be treated as a hostile witness. Hostile or not, I believe that Molly would get her point across. Her point would be that I am innocent of all charges. Molly might even belt out a few choruses of Billy Joel's "An Innocent Man." Molly has watched Law & Order.

A Children's Story

I have been thinking about writing a children's story but it is hard to use Molly as an inspiration. She is a great dog and she is my dog but she is never going to be confused with being child friendly, or people friendly, or other animal friendly. What I can use for inspiration is the animals that Molly I encounter along our daily walks, the things we enjoy doing, and the moral lessons that can be taught in a children's story. That would be a legacy that Molly and I would like to leave behind.

The Dog Days Of Summer

This heat is sucking the life right out of me and Molly. I did not have air conditioning last year but I made sure I had it this year. Air conditioning may be the greatest invention in the history of mankind. I know Molly is loving it. I do not know how we made it through last summer without it. When Molly and I walk outside in the heat, we look like two inmates on death row walking to the electric chair. I am just thankful that the house we liv e in is surrounded by lots of shade trees and there is usually a slight breeze blowing across the fields. However, all of the shade trees in the world cannot beat air conditioning.

Making It Through The Night

I can always tell when I have had a tough night sleeping because when I wake up the bed is torn all to hell. The fitted sheet is off the bed and wadded up, the sheet and quilt are all over the place and half in the floor, and I usually toss my pillows in the floor for whatever reason. I really do not know how Molly survives those kind of nights and I would be willing to bet she gets no sleep whatsoever. I would love to videotape me sleeping some time just to see what happens. My girlfriend swears that I one night I was farting in my sleep and then laughing about it and I never once woke up. I really find that hard to believe. I also allegedly talk in my sleep and that can be a dangerous thing.

"Move Over Lard Butt"

I made this comment a couple of weeks ago when my girlfriend was staying over and she mistakenly thought I said "Lard Butts" but I was referring to Molly. That has also been my affectionate nickname for her and it is more like a term of endearment. Once Molly settles into a spot on the bed, she is tough to move. Demanding, begging, pleading... none of it works. If I am in the living room and she hears a fork on a plate or me open the treat bag, Molly looks like Greg Louganis doing a half-gainer with a back flip coming off the bed to get in on dinner or some treats. Last night I was literally laying on top of Molly and she still wouldn't get up. She refuses to lay in her corner of the bed and insists on hogging the whole thing.