Christmas Day

Christmas Day is always great. Dan always gets me some special gourmet treats and usually a new pet bed or something. He usually has lots of visitors and I gets lots of belly rubs and plenty of attention.

This year I got some special treats and I didn't get a new pet bed this year because Dan said the Wal-Mart closest to our house didn't have any good ones. He more than made up for it by letting me nap on the electric blanket all day and he took me for long walks in the neighborhood. He really wanted to see what all of the neighborhood children got for Christmas. He hasn't seen anything too destructive so far so it may be a good year.

Merry Christmas! Molly

A Christmas Wish

Since this is Christmas Eve, I would like to express a Christmas wish. Dan adopted me from an animal shelter and I am glad that he went that route.

It was a tough beginning to my life but when Dan and Kathy showed up at that animal shelter on a Saturday morning in September of 2002, I was going to make sure that I got noticed. I was diving over all of the other dogs to get their attention and I just knew they were going to pick me. Sadly my brother was in there with me and they could only take one of us.

That is my Christmas wish. If you want to acquire an animal companion, even if it is a cat, go to the local animal shelter and take a look. All of these dogs (and cats) want is the same chance that I got and that is to go to a loving home. Usually you can find a puppy or even give an older dog a chance, but you will have a lifetime companion that help you live your life to the fullest. Everyone knows that dog owners live longer.

Doing My Calisthenics

Before Dan takes me out on one of our walks, I have to make sure I do my stretches. First is the front legs and then the back legs. I do not want to pull a hammy while I am out chasing a squirrel. Dan doesn't stretch for anything. I am surprised he can even make it out of bed. In spite of all of my winter weight, I do like to keep in shape. Something other than round anyway.

Every once in a while Dan will get the urge to run (at least what he calls running anyway) but it doesn't happen often. He calls what I have winter weight. He is only a few sandwiches shy of being a year round Santa Claus.

Jailbreak

I staged a jailbreak yesterday. Dan was taking me on one of my many afternoon walks and he didn't close the back door. When he turned around to close it I thought he was going to take me back in and I refused. I stopped really fast, ducked underneath the leash, and it came right off. I had the sweet taste of freedom!

I shook my head really hard to try to work out the kinks in my neck and I took off across the backyard. He immediately started yelling "Molly!" and he yelled it three times. When he yelled it that third time I knew I might be in trouble so I stopped and let him put the leash back on.

Pop artist Andy Warhol believed that everyone would have 15 minutes of fame. Being a dog, I had 15 seconds of untethered freedom and it was great!

Home Alone

Dan left me home alone so he could go to Charlotte last night. That is the first time he has ever done that. I don't need a babysitter and he left some lights on and he had someone stop and check on me a couple of times and let me out so I could use the bathroom. I did miss the electric blanket being on. I like snuggling down in that.

It was a little bit scary but I made it through the night. I should have taken a big dump on his bed but I did not want to have to smell it all night long so I held it until he got home about 7:30 this morning.

I was so happy to see him when he walked through the door although his clothes smelled like beer, strippers, and Thai food with a slight hint of IHOP. Did he bring me a doggie bag? No!!

Molly Is Back

My restriction is finally over. I have been on my best behavior. Dan has been really depressed this week so I have been trying to cheer him up. I would take him my toys from time to time and demand that he play with me. There is nothing that makes anyone feel better than playing with a dog. I also took naps with him just to let him know I was there for him and made my belly available for rubs. Seeing Dan depressed is really tough. Nobody is there for him except for me.
Molly

Molly's Couch

I give Molly some dog bicuits as treats a couple of times a day and she promptly buries them in the couch. She usually finds a spot in between the cushions or in the back of the cushions between the couch and the cushion. She uses whatever is laying on the couch to pack on top of her treats and it is usually some of my clothes or the daily mail.

If anyone, including myself, makes the mistake of sitting on that couch, then they have to answer to Molly. She starts by giving you a reproachful look as in "Get your ass off my treats!" and if that doesn't work, she starts pawing at the couch informing you that you need to get up. It usually doest the trick. She wants you off the couch.

Molly will return to her column tomorrow as her restriction will be lifted after her display of good behavior this week. She has avoided any altercations with Honey even though this afternoon she thought about it. The point is, she didn't act on her ill feelings towards Honey.

The Poopie Dance

A friend of mine told me that when her dog needs to go out real bad, she does what she describes as "the poopie dance." Molly, being the diva that she is, has turned her poopie dance into a dance routine that looks like it belongs in Michael Jackson's Thriller video.

Her dance routine comes complete with barking and growling and I believe she even throws in a moonwalk at the end of it. It has twists and turns, a few break dancing moves and it is quite impressive. She could easily win Dancing With The Stars. The only problem with that is she likes to perform her poopie dance at 2 or 3 in the morning when I am trying to sleep. Impressive but aggravating.

Molly The Tarheels Fan

Molly is a North Carolina Tarheels fan. Of course, I didn't give her much of a choice in the matter. If she would have come home one day wearing Clemson or Duke colors, she would have been right back in the pound.

Molly sits dutifully beside me during the basketball games, barks at the appropriate bad calls by the officials, and gets up and paces the floor with me. She is also aware enough to stay out of my way when things are going bad. She doesn't like wearing jerseys or she would have one proudly displayed on her backside.

Molly could also teach UGa a thing or two about being a mascot. Molly says sometimes you just have to come out of that cushy doghouse and bite somebody's ass!

Thats My Story And I Am Sticking To It

Dan has decided to revoke my internet privileges for a week all over a little incident that happened last night with Honey next door. Dan strained his neck Wednesday night (I am surprised it didn't happen at the strip club) and he was really hurting last night.

He had to walk me because he doesn't have anyone else. As soon as we rounded the corner of the house, here comes that flea-bag Honey. She started mouthing off and then growled at me. In my own yard! That was it, it was time to brawl! I told Dan it was coming. Paws were thrown, a little bit of chasing ensued, and Dan was caught in the middle. He took an inadvertent paw to the balls (thats my story and I am sticking it!)and that was it, fight over. In my defense, the bitch had it coming.
Molly